Feedback, please.

Dear Readers,

If you are out there, gimme some feedback on this.


Bare stage, centre and downstage is a large free standing bathtub.
The tub is full of water.
Inside bathtub are two men. They are fully clothed.
On the floor next to the tub are several bars of soap, a wash cloth, a scrubbing brush and some industrial bleach.

MAN ONE: Slow, it was all very slow and measured and the tones of all their voices were similar/

MAN TWO: (So…)They’d spent a lot of time together?

The intonation was very pleasing to them, as when people like the same colour. They had chosen a pitch and stuck with it.

It bothered me slightly,/

Bothered you?

….In the showers amongst the steam. Were they meant to be uniform?

Like the birds that shriek and never chew, just swallow?

Scrunching up his nose They sneaked, as if performing exercises that would better define their shadows. I did not watch, rather I ogled as they rubbed one another’s backs, soap and foam creating marbled ripples on naked bodies. Stands and becomes physically involved in the descriptions
They were proud; proud of themselves and of each other.
It is funny the way they grabbed at their flesh, as if to make sure the brilliance of their composition is real. Not a mirage.

Was there a leader?

Shaking his head They were so slow, so slow I could barely make out their faces.

Are you having a dream? Maybe you are talking in your sleep and I am simply here to note everything down, for later.

Batting away the questions with hands Why can’t I move the bar of soap over my body as they do? I am too fast, too repetitive.
I cannot form ripples.
I cannot form.
I am not part of them.

With this toothbrush I wish I could glide across my crooked dental structure and make the shapes they do, in the showers, amongst the steam….

You already said that!

What?

You already said that, at the beginning. About the shower and the bodies and the steam. We already know.

Who is ‘we’?

Us?

Don’t snap at me. We seem to be stuck here together.

Yes, I am here next to you, listening to you. I have been responding? All this interrogation, this whole conversation is a bit tiresome, don’t you think? And the water, it’s gotten cold.

I just want to be like the people in the showers, I want to be able to move and form a whole as they do.
I cannot form./

A whole? If everyone felt whole there would be no yearning, no…effort? Can you think?
I mean, really place a fine tooth comb back over your life to a time when you were really persistent?
You just didn’t give up.
I find that I persisted with people, with friends, lovers.
Something so complicated, somehow becomes a tangible, attractive a pursuit. Not like the future.
That loams over ones head, heavy and different and angry.
Angry because it thinks you will splinter its smooth surface with mistakes and tangents.

But, for me to persist is just to watch?

Silence

Oh, you bore me.
So these people, these figures are they sexy?

They’re beautiful.

Sexy?

Perfect.

Sexy, isn’t perfect. On this line, Man 2 turns away from Man 1, resting his chin on the edge of the tub.

What were they doing? What were you doing? Did they notice you watching? Do you like the feeling of being watched?

pause

Do you? Turning around again Man 2 stares at Man 1. Their faces are now incredibly close to one another. It should be visually clear to the audience that Man 2 is making Man 1 uncomfortable.
Man 2 quickly bores of the uncomfortable situation he creates and breaks the stare.

So watching them; is that like having a shower and watching television at the same time? Or reading porn on a tightrope?

What?

I am just raising the stakes. Distracting us, I can tell we are both going to end up with a cold or worse a chill. Your lips are blue, not as blue as your eyes. More like the blue of the ocean on a cold day, when it has nothing to offer you. Would you like to see? Your lips? I can find a mirror..../

The ceiling isn’t very high. Don’t bother with…You shouldn’t even be here. What if they come back? I am trying to keep a low profile. I could be a crack in a tile. I could just keep watching. I don’t have to stop….I won’t stop.

Is watching enough?

What else is there?

You just want to live vicariously through others?

Stop asking questions!

Okay, I am going to stay and watch. THAT.... was a statement.

Statement?

Now, you are asking the questions. I am going to stay and see what all the bloody fuss is about.

Standing up Do you think, wet clinging clothing makes you more appealing? Perhaps the ripples of the clothing could be mistaken for muscular definition?

PFFT!

Well, the heaviness. It could make me slow, tranquil.

STOP!…shhh

They are both at once motionless and silent.

What are we listening to?

The lapping...You must feel calmer now?

Man 1 remains silent

Cover your eyes

Man 1 obeys the command

Perhaps when you open your eyes. I can be interesting to watch? This will merely help us to pass the time. Till they come back. I can take off my clothes. You can practice. Watching me?

Still with his eyes covered I’ll watch you; but please don’t take your clothes off.

What? The movement in the water, as I remove my pants? Are you afraid it will give you motion sickness!? I’ll be slow, careful.

No….motion sickness!? Shaking his head, eyes still covered by his hands No, I am far too discerning to see you naked.

You could never be as slow as they are.

I am not relating to you very well. And while I’m at it, people should always answer a question.

Man 1 removes his hands from his face, so he may see again You don’t even know me.

Man 2 splashes water at Man 1’s face.

Don’t sulk, you’ll change shape. You will be bulky and cumbersome and there will be no where to put you. Nobody likes a waste of space.

What are you? A little man from God? Fuck you!

Something is taking form within you and I don’t like it. You are lively. I don’t like it. Do you want to watch or not?/

What would you like to say to them? What should we say to them?

“Serve me love, like a knight. But be sure to use a sharp knife. Be pensive, not encouraging”…. I find enthusiasm for life, repulsive. Man 1 lets out a large exhale ‘sigh’…My expectations will flounder, won’t they?


Something is Illuminating within ourselves… we’re having a simultaneous premonition.

But we’re both wrong…

Nodding…And now our bulbs burn brighter.

Man One reaches over the side of the tub and grabs a hooded jumper lying on the floor, he puts it on, pulling the hood up onto his head.

Take off that hood!

There’s no point, fruitfulness has moved to my periphery and I’d rather forget it's even there. They are NEVER coming back!

It is terribly dangerous, especially for one whose wish to see and not be seen.

At least the danger gives me a little thrill

You’ve just got too much time.

Yes, I find I write ‘To Do’ lists when I’m unoccupied. You should see my dairy, its full of them, it is embarrassing.

Just think of the state of your memoirs....